a few minuts ago ive talked to a friend.

We talked about different body types, the he said that im a bit bigger.  It could be the normal woman thing, to feel sad about it.

...but, i don't know... i think my figure is normal, not fat not thin. There to many mans who believe the adverts, which say, how a woman have to look like. Its a wrong picture.

I think that is even to the reason why i don't let boys get close to me. I don't want them to think about me that im a bit bigger. I want that they think "yes, thats a figure i like". Just like i do. 

It doesn't really matter to me how the body looks like. Its the whole package which is important. I like blue impressive eyes. But they could be green, brown or any other color. A bright smile, which catches someone. There are small thing.

everytime, when a relationship ends, i have the feeling something is dying inside of me. I can't say "i love you" anymore. don't know. it lyes on my tounge but, it couldn't come out of my mouth.

i don't have the feelin that the person give me that back what i give her. im to inward.